Skip to main content

Self-Awareness & Growth


 

I'm sure seeing the title made some people cringe.

Are these not some of the biggest buzzwords over the last 5 years? On one hand, I am sure a lot of people are frustrated with the avalanche of "self-improvement advice", I am sure that there are feelings of aren't I already enough? Am I not already good enough.


You are 100% enough.


That is not the point of this post. My hope in writing this is that it may help you appreciate how often we are our own barriers for the success that we want. Most of us have grown up and come through systems that promote the status quo. Most people will rationalize the status quo (even when it is in conflict with their own interests) as legitimate in order to fit in and be accepted.

A popular frame for this is that it is done out of fear. That we fear the unknown, it lacks certainty so we do what we can to avoid it. The truth is you cannot fear something that you know nothing about. Your fear is coming from your perception of the unknown, the frames that you put around it. You fear the certainty of the known, of where you fit in, and of how you currently understand the world.


It's powerful once you come to appreciate that and give yourself permission to not only question more about the world around you, but your own beliefs and understanding of it.

The only way you (or anyone) can truly help yourself is by challenging your ideas.


When you are feeling frustrated with where you currently are, when you scroll social and see 'everyone' more together, more successful, happier than you are; you feel frustrated because of how you are perceiving where you should be. We start looking for a "quick fix". It must be that I need a relationship, a different relationship, more friends, less friends, a better job, etc.

The truth is you are focusing more on winning than you are playing the game. If all you think about is how to 'win' you will never be satisfied with where you are.


Start focusing on progress. 

What are your interests? What do you choose to do with your time when you have complete control? What are things that are tied to that or run parallel?

What are the parts of your job you enjoy? Is there another job that has more of that type of work? Have you looked?


You have to invest in yourself. No one can give you the answers. Life is not a math equation, there is not linear way to approach the problem and solve it (if there was, it would be a pretty boring place!).




Comments

Popular posts from this blog

This 1 Thing Increases Your Career Capital More Than Anything Else

The Art of Better Decision Making Have you felt scared to make a decision? Maybe you get preoccupied with making the 'wrong' decision?  Did you know that 68% of people have admitted to not doing because they thought it would be harder than it actually is. Getting comfortable with making decisions is one of the biggest challenges new leaders face. You will be placed in situations where there isn't enough time to get all of the information. Or even harder, you will be placed in situations where you'll never get more information than what you have. The good news? Making better decisions is something that you can improve by being deliberate with your learning and how you choose to approach it. This is the approach I take to decision making. These have been test and is what I have used over my 15 year career to teach and develop teams. - Accept that you will make mistakes. There is rarely a perfect answer. Getting comfortable with ambiguity is a leadership muscle you need to

Your Next Five Moves

 There are two streams of thought when you start reading a book and you don't feel like you are connecting with it. Some people will say to stop reading it and move onto something else, the theory is that there are so many things in the world that you will enjoy reading, that you shouldn't be wasting your time on things that you don't. Camp B will tell you to stick with it, get through it and see what happens. If I had to "pick a side" I probably fall more into team B than team A, even though I do feel that there will always be some books / material that you should just put down. What has me more B than A? Some of the books that have had the most impact on me were a STRUGGLE to get through. I challenge that this may because they are pushing your boundaries and putting something up against your current worldview / paradigms. True growth and learning comes from when you can challenge and dismantle your own ideas, and rebuilt them anew. My first real experience with

Decisions, Positions and Frames

  Making decisions and getting consensus is the most common activity that every person goes through. Whether in your personal or professional life, we are all selling, all the time. Selling? I'm not selling anything! Actually, that's not really true. At the most fundamental level, selling is about the transfer of belief. You are trying to get a person or a group to see things the way you do. If they accept that, you make the "sale" (i.e. you have transferred your idea/belief) as another has chosen to accept it. Where things get hard is when people hold onto certain ideas, frames or positions around a circumstance. It's interesting how little people realize what they share related to their position without even knowing it. The information is there, as long as you are listening. Always be listening. When someone repeats a variable or constraint that is a difference, that has major impact. They themselves they may not realize that they are essentially confirming what